We come to know love only in the context of failure. Before failure no knowledge exists. Knowledge always follows after eating the fruit of life. In every love the experience of tasting paradise and losing paradise is reborn. In the pursuit of love we are exiled from the fullness of life which love alone grants.
In the experience of love we are all like Adam and Eve. The experience of others teaches us nothing. For each of us love is the first and greatest lesson of life, the first and greatest disappointment. The greatest lesson because we pursue in love the mode of life. The greatest disappointment because the mode proves to be inaccessible to our human nature.
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After the experience of failure we recognize that love is the mode of life, but a mode inaccessible to our human nature. Our nature thirsts hopelessly for relation, but lacking the knowledge of how to exist in the mode of relation is constantly disappointed. It does not know how to share, how to give of itself. It only knows how to make life its own, how to appropriate and exploit it. If the taste of fullness is a communion of life with the Other, our natural drive destroys this communion, turning it into a possessive and demanding domination of the Other. The loss of paradise is never an imposed punishment. It is an exile we bring upon ourselves.